So a man got a flat tire in front of an insane asylum....
First the rest of that joke isn't all that funny so go ahead and google it if you want to, I have better things to post. Second, Yes I know haven't blogged in like 2 years and talking about flat tire is a fairly stupid topic to get "back in the saddle with".... get over it. Moving on.......
It has come to my attention among my many aforementioned Achilles heals/ Waterloos I have neglected to mention my complete INEPTITUDE with the automobile and all things connected to mechanisms and maintenance. May I just say how much it BLOWS (no pun intended) putting air in tires. I mean really....(get ready for the another list in 5, 4, 3, 2,....)
I possess
A) A College Degree in Liberal Arts, Cum Laude (which might I add focuses on LOGIC AND REASONING) in not one, BUT TWO majors with a potential THIRD (damn the elusive ancient language credit) major
B) four fully functioning limbs which fully function to their utmost potential
and
C) an immeasurable amount of willpower and determination toward life and all of its challenges.
however apparently non of these rather impressive attributes do jack shit when it comes to putting air in ones tires.
My car has deemed my rather feeble attempts to appease its gluttonous lust for "air" unsatisfactory, and has now launch a series of of what I feel are unwarranted attacks on the electrical system.
Not only is the nifty little electrical oracle on the dash of my car telling me I need air in my tires it now also claims....
1) I need to replace my washer fluid
2) I am low on fuel.
3) the gas cap is loosed and must be replaced by shelling out money to my car guy
4) because of the loose gas cap the engine light has decided to illuminate without any intentions of righting itself.
5) the year is actually 2011 and if it so chooses it will tell me its Monday despite the fact that I know it is FRIDAY....
Oh I tried to fix the problem but there were numbers.... lots of numbers....
I concede oh great car gods of the sky. Oh patron saint Henry Ford I invoke thee! Save me from my car and its ever mounting PMS......
It has come to my attention among my many aforementioned Achilles heals/ Waterloos I have neglected to mention my complete INEPTITUDE with the automobile and all things connected to mechanisms and maintenance. May I just say how much it BLOWS (no pun intended) putting air in tires. I mean really....(get ready for the another list in 5, 4, 3, 2,....)
I possess
A) A College Degree in Liberal Arts, Cum Laude (which might I add focuses on LOGIC AND REASONING) in not one, BUT TWO majors with a potential THIRD (damn the elusive ancient language credit) major
B) four fully functioning limbs which fully function to their utmost potential
and
C) an immeasurable amount of willpower and determination toward life and all of its challenges.
however apparently non of these rather impressive attributes do jack shit when it comes to putting air in ones tires.
My car has deemed my rather feeble attempts to appease its gluttonous lust for "air" unsatisfactory, and has now launch a series of of what I feel are unwarranted attacks on the electrical system.
Not only is the nifty little electrical oracle on the dash of my car telling me I need air in my tires it now also claims....
1) I need to replace my washer fluid
2) I am low on fuel.
3) the gas cap is loosed and must be replaced by shelling out money to my car guy
4) because of the loose gas cap the engine light has decided to illuminate without any intentions of righting itself.
5) the year is actually 2011 and if it so chooses it will tell me its Monday despite the fact that I know it is FRIDAY....
Oh I tried to fix the problem but there were numbers.... lots of numbers....
I concede oh great car gods of the sky. Oh patron saint Henry Ford I invoke thee! Save me from my car and its ever mounting PMS......
posted by susan at 11:10 PM
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