May the lord have mercy upon my soul....
Well the earth has stopped spinning and fallen off its axis. Prepare yourself, folks, for the signs have come together and the end is nigh. My only explanation for the events that took place in my apartment today is that we have entered the final days before the Apocalypse. That's right in my very kitchen.
I cooked.......and it was successful.........
I actually baked vanilla pudding mocha brownie muffins- without a recipe mind you - they didn't burn, or blow up THEY DIDN'T EVEN TASTE THAT BAD.....
I am not sure how to interpret this success after have years of mishaps in culinary arts. In fact even the lightest of spirits deemed me a total failure (aka my grandma). And to suddenly just cook something. Its all very unnerving. Which has lead me to believe that the devil himself had a hand in this......
REPENT THOU DAMNED SINNER FOR THE WAGES OF SIN IS DEATH! I MYSELF HAVE BEEN TEMPTED, REJECTING THE PATH OF RIGHTNESS FOR NAUGHT BUT A GOOEY DELICIOUS BIT OF BAKED GOODS. I HAVE DANCED WITH THE MIXER OF GLUTTONY AND SACRIFICE UPON THE ALTER OF THE PAGAN GODDESS BETTY CROCKER......
BEWARE....FOR THE MUFFIN MAN COMETH! *rocks back and forth singing "do you know the muffin man" in a creepy childlike voice*
*cough*....so um, i have muffins if anyone wants them...i'm just saying it would be nice to have some company. Maybe watch a movie or something. um...*breaks down sobbing* .....
i am soooo alone.........and incidentally have suddenly discovered the possibilities italics offer in relating vocal inflection.
I cooked.......and it was successful.........
I actually baked vanilla pudding mocha brownie muffins- without a recipe mind you - they didn't burn, or blow up THEY DIDN'T EVEN TASTE THAT BAD.....
I am not sure how to interpret this success after have years of mishaps in culinary arts. In fact even the lightest of spirits deemed me a total failure (aka my grandma). And to suddenly just cook something. Its all very unnerving. Which has lead me to believe that the devil himself had a hand in this......
REPENT THOU DAMNED SINNER FOR THE WAGES OF SIN IS DEATH! I MYSELF HAVE BEEN TEMPTED, REJECTING THE PATH OF RIGHTNESS FOR NAUGHT BUT A GOOEY DELICIOUS BIT OF BAKED GOODS. I HAVE DANCED WITH THE MIXER OF GLUTTONY AND SACRIFICE UPON THE ALTER OF THE PAGAN GODDESS BETTY CROCKER......
BEWARE....FOR THE MUFFIN MAN COMETH! *rocks back and forth singing "do you know the muffin man" in a creepy childlike voice*
*cough*....so um, i have muffins if anyone wants them...i'm just saying it would be nice to have some company. Maybe watch a movie or something. um...*breaks down sobbing* .....
i am soooo alone.........and incidentally have suddenly discovered the possibilities italics offer in relating vocal inflection.
posted by susan at 8:42 PM
2 Comments:
Mmmm, muffins. I can't have any because I'm across an ocean from them, but eat one in my name, Susan.
See I knew you could do it. The crazy recipe-file idea I had (of very low-talent-necessary recipes, mind you) doesn't seem so off-base now, does it?
~Erika
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